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Comic Relief

Everyone I follow on Twitter is at Comic-Con today, and their tweets—about the outs I won’t be able to geek—are like tiny lightsabers piercing my fat nerd-heart. Officially, money and time are the reasons behind my absence there, but perhaps something more sinister is at work. The following is an actual (slightly paraphrased) transcript from my relationship:

The only fictitious part is the idea of Russell wearing shorts. I can’t thank my cohort enough, however, for putting this comic together. He really went above and beyond, and finally reveled himself to be good for something.

BBQ Pork Chops

  • pork chops
  • salt
  • pepper
  • Italian seasoning
  • 1/4 cup lemon vincotto vinegar

Liberally season pork chops with salt, pepper and italian seasoning. Set aside for 15–20 minutes. Pour vinegar over chops and let them marinate for about 10 minutes. Grill on barbeque, basting with vinegar until done. For thin bone-in chops, I grill for about 7 minutes per side.

Not that anyone asked, but monsieur Bourdain is among my Five—that is, the five celebrities I’m allowed to fool around with, irrespective of my relationship status. Witty, handsome, tall (for a Frenchman), anti-vegan and has multiple, spongeable foodie careers? Russell’s right to keep my anatomy in check, especially since Comic-Con is the perfect venue to accidentally violate him. I mean, I was just some Cthulhu he bumped into in the bathroom, right? The room was tiny, I couldn’t see through the eyeholes and when we tripped, I had no control over what/where on him my tentacles perforated. Based on the strength of their porn, the Japanese must think this is the best idea in the history of ever.

TWTG says, “My hands smell like cleaning supplies and onion.”


In No Mood

Serenity now!

TWTG has had the shittiest day possible. Hand to God, the worst day in a long, long while. And while I have little to no desire to post tonight, I’m going to do it because I’m committed to the cause. No fancy talk, no snarky comments, just me bitching a little bit about how life can simply take it out of you. I’m sure I’ll be back to my ever so charming self in no time, so please be patient.

Regardless of my personal issues I still had to feed the troops. Here’s what I came up with. It was delicious.

At Home Shake N Bake

I even managed sides! Supermom indeed.

  • 5-6 pork chops
  • 1 cup buttermilk
  • 2 cups panko
  • 1/3 cup parmesan
  • 1 tbsp Italian seasoning
  • 1 tsp salt
  • 1/2 tsp garlic powder
  • 1/2 tsp pepper

Preheat oven to 350˚. Place all ingredients except pork chops in a large Ziplock baggie. Shake a little to mix. Dredge pork chops in buttermilk and allow most of the liquid to drain off. Place pork chops in bag and shake to coat. Bake on a baking sheet (duh) for 20 minutes. I turned mine at 10 minutes so both sides could brown, but you can also just leave them be. Serve to grateful family. (Yeah, they better be grateful that the knife was only used for making dinner.)

Again, I’m sorry that you won’t find anything clever here this evening. I suppose even someone as fabulous as me is allowed to have a bad day.

TWTG says, “Sigh.”