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Comic Relief

Everyone I follow on Twitter is at Comic-Con today, and their tweets—about the outs I won’t be able to geek—are like tiny lightsabers piercing my fat nerd-heart. Officially, money and time are the reasons behind my absence there, but perhaps something more sinister is at work. The following is an actual (slightly paraphrased) transcript from my relationship:

The only fictitious part is the idea of Russell wearing shorts. I can’t thank my cohort enough, however, for putting this comic together. He really went above and beyond, and finally reveled himself to be good for something.

BBQ Pork Chops

  • pork chops
  • salt
  • pepper
  • Italian seasoning
  • 1/4 cup lemon vincotto vinegar

Liberally season pork chops with salt, pepper and italian seasoning. Set aside for 15–20 minutes. Pour vinegar over chops and let them marinate for about 10 minutes. Grill on barbeque, basting with vinegar until done. For thin bone-in chops, I grill for about 7 minutes per side.

Not that anyone asked, but monsieur Bourdain is among my Five—that is, the five celebrities I’m allowed to fool around with, irrespective of my relationship status. Witty, handsome, tall (for a Frenchman), anti-vegan and has multiple, spongeable foodie careers? Russell’s right to keep my anatomy in check, especially since Comic-Con is the perfect venue to accidentally violate him. I mean, I was just some Cthulhu he bumped into in the bathroom, right? The room was tiny, I couldn’t see through the eyeholes and when we tripped, I had no control over what/where on him my tentacles perforated. Based on the strength of their porn, the Japanese must think this is the best idea in the history of ever.

TWTG says, “My hands smell like cleaning supplies and onion.”

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24 responses »

  1. this is damn good

    Reply
  2. THAT is freaking funny, TWTG.

    Reply
  3. That comic is too funny!
    Especially since I know you have been obsessing about comiccon for at least two days now. 🙂
    Perhaps it is best you don’t go. There could be a restraining order at the end of it.
    Cheers,
    Laura

    Reply
    • I got “this” close to getting on the set of True Blood a few years ago. Then one of the producers heard about my obsession with “Eric”. Invitation withdrawn. I should probably attempt not to be quite so enthusiastic with my celebrity crushes.

      Reply
  4. that comic is brilliant.

    Reply
  5. Cool strip and tasty-looking recipe. Nice to know someone other than wife who’ll admit to having a list like the one you mention 😀

    Reply
  6. Pingback: #randytravispenis « The White Trash Gourmet

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