Because I’m a harlot for ratings, because my hit count resets every Monday and because you needed one more obnoxious thing to pop up on your Facebook, I’m going to maximize my Sunday numbers by launching a new feature called “…Of The Week.” What is it? Whatever stupid, gimmicky thing I want it to be. For example, this week is “Top 5 Bizarro Search Engine Terms Of The Week.” This is a quintet of the random-ass things people are looking for that Google thought my site was a good candidate to provide:
“Forced to eat crap because white trash coworker will not try new food”
“Lady’s chubby bum”
“Nice Vietnamese boobs”
“Disgusting white trash with guns photo”
“Cumin’ while rape”
That last one isn’t a typo. Well, it is, but I’ve transcribed it exactly as it came to me (no pun intended). Either someone doesn’t know how two Ms create a short U sound, or they like a little spice to go with their sexual shenanigans.
TWTG says, “I need a booger rag.”