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It’s So Obvious!

Cookies and milk.

It doesn’t happen often. But, when it does, you’re allowed the smug satisfaction of being the smartest kid on your block (and usually one of the three smartest on any other block). The duh moment. It’s that instance where the clouds lift, you can see the forest for its trees and other cliches of this nature. It’s that most perfect little idea you can’t help but tell everyone—even they didn’t ask and would never actually want. See where I’m going with this? Yeah, I’m about to break your brain.

For the grown-up Girl Scout.

The Girls Scouts of the United States of America need to make a breakfast cereal. Pregnant pause. Think about it: They mostly pimp their boxes of wholesome, cookie goodness outside grocery stores, right? Who hasn’t had to make a secondary trip to the grocery store for forgetting the milk? Milk. Cereal. How has this not been thought of yet? Since we’re quickly becoming a health-oriented nation (even the Cookie Monster is losing his trade), transitioning from pastries to grains would be a very logical way to encourage this mentality. If nothing else, it’ll help these catty, green-sashed scrumpets and their overachieving, failure moms sleep a tad tighter. All that’s missing is a clever name. I was thinking “Girl Scout Os,” but that sounds dirty.

The Sweet Girl Scout Cocktail

  • 1 shot cake vodka
  • 1 shot malibu rum
  • 1 shot butterscotch schnapps
  • 2 shots “Adult Chocolate Milk” (I know! I was feeling the same exact way!)
  • 1 shot half & half
  • Garnish of coconut flakes (or, even better, toasted coconut)

It's a liquid cookie!

Place all ingredients except coconut in shaker over ice. Shake well. Pour into martini glass and garnish with coconut. I did a lot of research and found a million-and-one recipes for the “Dirty Girl Scout”, which is any number of cocktails that are supposed to taste like a Thin Mint cookie. I personally don’t like the Thin Mint all that much (heresy, I know) but I adore the Caramel deLights. That’s the cookie this drink emulates. It might not be an exact copy, but it’s really yummy nonetheless. Maybe a swirl of caramel and chocolate would make it just right. Rest assure that I will be experimenting to see what might happen. Oh no, look, I have to drink another batch. Oh, darn.

I checked and there’s actually a Facebook page that beat me to the punch. Great minds really do think alike. But… yeah, I’m still gonna claim authorship. They forgot to include a clever name—no name, no patent! And, in case you were wondering, I was never a girl scout. Of course not. I was too busy smoking.


7 responses »

  1. ha! i usually buy thin mints and put them in the freezer where they sit for 6 months until i throw them out. they are good in theory, not so much the reality. give me a mallomar any day! (pinwheels are not the same. i think i need to take down one of your cookie recipes and try them.)

    • Lynn – Let me know what kind of cookie recipe you want and i’ll develop something just for you… or since you live up the way I can just drop some off 😉

      • oh my real cookies!!!!!!

        i’m not sure, i am a big fan of regular chocolate chips. but i have to tell you, i haven’t made cookies in about 100 years. i always tend to burn them. i can make odd shaped biscotti, but that’s about it. and scones, but i haven’t done that in a while either.

        i have an ice cream maker now, so maybe you can show us an ice cream recipe? you can’t fuck up ice cream too much. ALTHOUGH, i did. i forgot to put the freezer thing in and just poured my coffee chip mixture into the machine.

        see, better fuck than cook. i had a joke in the 90’s “i’m not a really good cook, the only thing i know how to do in the kitchen is fuck. and people wonder how i stay so thin”


  2. I sometimes smoke too. Ex hated it and loved it, he would always say, he will always remember me every time he smells smoke. It is funny, I clicked on your link and heard my mom’s voice in my head. “That one is too pretty for her own good” She used to say that to about me when I was a kid. At first I didn’t recognize where the thought came from, then I remembered. She would always roll her eyes. Like I should be guilty.

    I thought that about you, but I did not roll my eyes. Just so you know. You shouldn’t feel guilty.

    • Fun – You give the sweetest compliments.

      The electronic smokes are working. In the last 48 hours I’ve had exactly 2.5 real cigs. Not bad for a lady that loves her smokes. Maybe it’s the hand to mouth action and being able to inhale and exhale something that feels/tastes like tobacco. Who knows, but I’m hopeful 🙂


  3. Loved reading this – the cocktail looks great!


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