It doesn’t happen often. But, when it does, you’re allowed the smug satisfaction of being the smartest kid on your block (and usually one of the three smartest on any other block). The duh moment. It’s that instance where the clouds lift, you can see the forest for its trees and other cliches of this nature. It’s that most perfect little idea you can’t help but tell everyone—even they didn’t ask and would never actually want. See where I’m going with this? Yeah, I’m about to break your brain.
The Girls Scouts of the United States of America need to make a breakfast cereal. Pregnant pause. Think about it: They mostly pimp their boxes of wholesome, cookie goodness outside grocery stores, right? Who hasn’t had to make a secondary trip to the grocery store for forgetting the milk? Milk. Cereal. How has this not been thought of yet? Since we’re quickly becoming a health-oriented nation (even the Cookie Monster is losing his trade), transitioning from pastries to grains would be a very logical way to encourage this mentality. If nothing else, it’ll help these catty, green-sashed scrumpets and their overachieving, failure moms sleep a tad tighter. All that’s missing is a clever name. I was thinking “Girl Scout Os,” but that sounds dirty.
The Sweet Girl Scout Cocktail
- 1 shot cake vodka
- 1 shot malibu rum
- 1 shot butterscotch schnapps
- 2 shots “Adult Chocolate Milk” (I know! I was feeling the same exact way!)
- 1 shot half & half
- Garnish of coconut flakes (or, even better, toasted coconut)
Place all ingredients except coconut in shaker over ice. Shake well. Pour into martini glass and garnish with coconut. I did a lot of research and found a million-and-one recipes for the “Dirty Girl Scout”, which is any number of cocktails that are supposed to taste like a Thin Mint cookie. I personally don’t like the Thin Mint all that much (heresy, I know) but I adore the Caramel deLights. That’s the cookie this drink emulates. It might not be an exact copy, but it’s really yummy nonetheless. Maybe a swirl of caramel and chocolate would make it just right. Rest assure that I will be experimenting to see what might happen. Oh no, look, I have to drink another batch. Oh, darn.
I checked and there’s actually a Facebook page that beat me to the punch. Great minds really do think alike. But… yeah, I’m still gonna claim authorship. They forgot to include a clever name—no name, no patent! And, in case you were wondering, I was never a girl scout. Of course not. I was too busy smoking.